Plaid Tumblr Themes

Text Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 179 notes


Client tells me about multiple problems she’s having with her website.

Me: I recommend you to send me an e-mail.

Client: Like… uh… an empty e-mail?

Me: No, one that outlines all these problems so I can fix them for you. 

Client: What makes you think I have time to figure out what my problems are?

Me: What makes you think I do?

Text Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 192 notes


Me: So your username is your employee number, without the “e” and with an extra zero on the end.

Client: Is that a capital zero? Or just the little one?

Me: Just the number, zero.

Client: So upper case?

Text Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 253 notes


Client: All our sites are down!

Me: Seems fine here.

Client: We pay you to maintain this stuff, not cause more problems!

Me: I didn’t take your sites down. How do you know it’s my fault?

Client: It can’t be our fault! Our internet doesn’t even seem to be working!

Text Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 271 notes


Client: Can you print this for me?

Me: No, it has Elmo on it.

Client: I bought it off Etsy, and she said I could get it printed here.

Me: Elmo is trademarked. I can’t print copyrighted material.

Client: I have permission to print this from the artist on Etsy.

Me: Do they own Elmo’s trademark?

Client: I’m confident they do. 

Link Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 1,752 notes


I created content and hosted files for a client for over a year; at least, until she sent me a cease and desist letter. This voided my contract a month before the final invoice was due. I believe this was an attempt to avoid payment – there were otherwise no issues in our working arrangement.

Link Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 659 notes



I had a simple, common contact form on my design portfolio website that worked well for about a year. Then I had this exchange with a prominent local reporter / blogger via Twitter to her 5,000+ followers:

Client: #WEBDESIGN #FAIL! @(myhandle)’s contact form terribly broken! Can’t get in touch…

Link Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 1,983 notes


I was working with a client, whose son was in his mid-twenties and liked to be involved in the design of the website. He was into the ‘newest technology’ and buzzwords, so asking me to make things ‘pop’ was an everyday occurrence.

Client: I don’t like that colour. You should try something…

Photo Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 1,832 notes

(Source: clientsfromhell)

Link Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 1,202 notes


So last week I tried using a language analogy for a client’s project. The project manager said the project was straight HTML/CSS when in fact it was C++.

To help him understand the problem I used this analogy: “Let’s say you’re asking me to write something in a specific language, I am fluent…

Text Post Thu, Jul. 24, 2014 36,151 notes


Client: I threw out that black pen, it was out of ink.

Me: What black pen?

Client: The one that was lying on your tablet.

Me: You threw out my $150 Wacom pen?

Client: I tried writing with it and it didn’t work. It must’ve been out of ink.

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